The Rider’s Mind Podcast Episode 67: 3 Types of Horsepeople to Watch Out For
In this episode, I discuss three types of people who may impact your vibe and your ride. These are people you want to avoid or learn to establish boundaries with.
Watch out for: the person who gives unsolicited advice, the one-upper and the energy vampire/leech.
If you spend too much time around these people or put too much emphasis on their opinions, you’re likely to impact your vibe and your ability to compete. People who have these tendencies can actually be good friends, but it’s important you know their type and how they can impact you. Then you can decide whether to receive their energy or not. If you find you’re attracting a lot of these people, consider what type of vibe you’re putting out that makes these people attracted to you.
WATCH OUT FOR: The person that gives unsolicited advice.
This person sees you riding and meanders over to offer advice on bits, techniques or training. This person is someone who tells you what you need to be doing without you opening the door for that advice. This might not be the person you want to take advice from. Usually, the people who have the answers you need are not the ones who are freely giving advice. Those wise people often need to be asked for their advice.
Unsolicited advice can often come from people who unconsciously feel the need to prove they know something and to fulfil their own insecurities. In their mind, “they’re just trying to help”.
Ask yourself, Can this person walk their talk? Does this person share similar values and horsemanship goals as you do?
If you want advice, ASK – but be mindful of who you’re going to ask! Sometimes when you ask, you open a tap that you might not be able to shut off. People do love to share and to help. Don’t ask 5 people the same question. Choose someone who aligns with your values and goals and create a relationship with them so you can seek advice.
WATCH OUT FOR: The one-upper
This is a person who always has done something better than you or has something even better than you. They can really dampen your excitement when you share something and they one-up you. It’s often an unconscious habit for these people.
Remember, when you encounter a one-upper, their comments say more about them than you. Sometimes people are just trying to relate to what you’re saying. These people often have an insecurity that makes them blurt out their “better than yours” comment.
When you encounter a one-upper, try to look at their comments as interesting. Don’t let them take your power away. The one-upper is not someone you want to be around pre-game, especially if they trigger your insecurities.
WATCH OUT FOR: The energy vampire or energy leech
The energy vampire subconsciously leans on you for energetic support to lift them up. If you're an empath, you’re more likely to attract the energy vampire because you make them feel better. This can create an energetic cord so they are drawing on you for good energy and sending you their bad energy.
Avoid energy leeches pre-game. If you encounter an energy leech, create a good energetic boundary so you can let things bounce off of you. You might need to cut energetic cords after every interaction if you’re finding your boundaries aren’t working. Work on raising your own vibe and set an example of how to thrive on your own energy.
People that fall into these categories generally don’t know they are these people. It’s important you're doing the work to protect yourself.
The more secure you are in your values and your knowledge, the less these types impact you. As you recognize these types of people, you can see their behaviour as interesting, not directed AT you.
Look at yourself and see why you might be attracting these types of people.
Are your own insecurities being shown?
Are there lessons to be learned like better boundaries or a stronger sense of your own self-worth?
Are you wearing a “I don’t know what I’m doing” sign so you attract a lot of unsolicited advice?
Are you wearing a “I love others more than I love myself” sign so others pick that up at a subconscious level and know you’ll be a giver of energy?
You can give, share and help elevate people, but it can’t be at the expense of your own health and energy level.
Watch out for the unsolicited advice giver, the one-upper and the energy vampire. Remember these are still great people, but that you need good boundaries and a strong sense of self when you encounter them.
Join the Conversation
Join the discussion in the The Rider’s Mind Community on Facebook. As a member of this community, you’ll also get tips and videos from me.
Learn with Me
If you’re looking to make changes to your mindset, be sure to sign up for my free Next-Level Mindset Mini Course.
You can also get on the waitlist for Stride, my next-level barrel racing group. This group receives video training and coaching from me and Stride members also have access to special guests. We work on becoming mindful barrel racers so we can show up, be present and perform with great partnership.